By A Guy Who Was There (Okay it’s Mark B.)
Introduction by Dr. Gruesome:
“So I am not real sure who this Mark guy is, but I know he claims to be me sometimes. He’s a big liar, so if I cared about the truth, (ha), I would read the following with some skepticism.”
Dr. Gruesome (also a big liar)
The Rise & Fall & Rise & Hovering Around Of The Show That Wouldn’t Die
(Or How Does This Show Keep Coming Back To Haunt Me) Part One
Doctor Gruesome’s Movie Morgue 1987
So the show began this way. About 1987 there was a creative meeting, where we were to discuss stunts to try and get some attention, ratings and some press. The TV station was kind of floundering, not yet a Fox affiliate, and things were not good. There were two TV related newspaper columnists in those days, who would rarely if ever write about us, and when they did it was always a complaint. (Yes we had two newspapers here, it was that long ago.)
So the General Manager called all the creative types in and asked for ideas. Anything at all.
I was the Art Director and a spot Writer, and I also chose the movies for the station, being a big movie buff. It was the early days of the TV station and there weren’t that many of us. I had just been reading “The Golden Turkey Awards” (1980) by Michael & Harry Medved, one of the original “movies so bad it’s good” books, and since I had the movie lists of titles we had a contract to show, I noted to them that we had pretty much everything on the list. And wouldn’t it be funny if we did a whole weekend of “bad” movies, got local radio disk jockies to host it, and I would write hosting bits where they could tell the audience why the movie was funny and not just “bad”. We could do press releases, and ads, and the radio station could talk about “Bad Movie Weekend”.
(A TV promotion secret- every disk jockey wants to be on TV. )
We ran “Plan 9 From Outer Space” Friday at 8pm. I will try to find a list of the other movies we ran. Give me a break, it was 34 years ago.
So I picked movies, I wrote the host segments, I made ads (that was my actual job). The radio station agreed to do it. The DJ’s came to the studio, and did the “host segments”. EXCEPT, they really just blabbed on, as if they were having a party, and declined to read any of the prepared stuff about why you should watch this crummy movie, and in the next segment a guy gets killed by being hit with a big piece of cactus. (Really, he does.)
So the whole reason for showing these crap movies was to point out the laughs to be had. And we had seven hosted movies of blathering on, with no jokes.
NOW AN ASIDE….. so the autumn of 1986, I wrote a series of spots featuring “Inspector 35” where he had a police line-up of shows he switched around, broke into people’s homes with his large friend and changed the channel permanently to 35 then took the knob or the remote so they wouldn’t hurt themselves watching bad TV, and made fun of current commercial ads, all to promote the station. Matt (Skeeter) was the large detective and was just a looming presence, who did not speak. These were 30 second spots. The Promo Manager says to me “Well, I thought you were going to be the Inspector character.” Hmmm says I… I guess I am then.
BONUS Movie Morgue secret…Matt is actually taller than me, he is always hunched over as Skeeter, kneeling on a small stool, so he appears shorter that me on the show. Matt had started at the station shortly before, as a gofer, then the film editor. He had actually been in a college class I taught. (History of Animation, yes I am an animation buff, but we aren’t discussing that here. Maybe that will be another blog.) We share many of the same hobbies, and he is a good egg and very funny.
Eventually we had stopped that TV Police series, but these characters had been on the air up to then, so we sat behind some boxes to the side of the set, and panning over, shot segments where Inspector 35 & Lt Brickhouse (Matt) actually read the humorous stuff coming up, and hosted the host segments.
The whole thing was a big hit. Made the papers, sold out the commercials. Ticked all the boxes for a struggling TV station.
SO MARK YOU NEED TO DO IT AGAIN. Not wanting to repeat, we did Sci-Fi Weekend, leading off on Friday with 2001 A Space Odyssey, and alternating the movies with good and bad movies. Inspector 35 and Lt Brickhouse actually hosted this one, in “space suits”, with two radio DJ’s chiming in from the cargo hold. Let’s make it clear, it was a small TV station, and no one was watching over my shoulder, so these things were a hoot. The host segments had actual jokes in them, about space food and all sorts of stuff. At the end we “accidentally” dumped the DJ’s out into space, but agreed that DJ’s didn’reallly need oxygen anyway, so we would swing around and pick them up after the movie.
Huge sell out. Big ratings. Made the papers. Mark, do it again.
SON OF BAD MOVIE WEEKEND- Robot Monster led off Friday night, with a bunch more “bad movies”. Huge commercial sales. No pretense of who the hosts were. BUT—
The General Manager called me in and said, “Do you want to do a weekly hosted movie show?” Well, how do you say no to that? The station had the syndicated Elvira show Saturdays at 11pm. But there was a Saturday noon movie open. It would be kind of a kids show, showing the the Universal horror movie package. Yeah, I was in.
I will write it. But maybe we should get a real actor for the host.
“You are doing fine. Maybe you and Matt can do something.” Maybe we can….
To Be Continued… ©2021 | Powered by WordPress and Sup